THE DEFENSE ALWAYS HAS A THEORY.

IT’S NOT TRUMP’S FAULT

Six Flags adding seat belts to Goliath rollercoaster following death

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Voting on: Six Flags adding seat belts to Goliath rollercoaster following death

Yes, it's Trump's fault

The prosecution's case: Six Flags adding seat belts to Goliath rollercoaster following death

The extreme prosecution of the sourced event.

No, it's not Trump's fault

The defense's case: Six Flags adding seat belts to Goliath rollercoaster following death

The extreme defense of the sourced event.

A courtroom excuse or victory lap pushed to the extreme, using the same factual record.

Real event · international · 2026-10-24

The defense's case: Six Flags adding seat belts to Goliath rollercoaster following death

Final verdict announced: October 25, 2026 at 2:01 PM ET

Satire

The extreme defense of the sourced event.

What actually happened

Real headline

Six Flags adding seat belts to Goliath rollercoaster following death

The CEO of the amusement park chain said the company is evaluating its safety procedures at all of its 34 locations.

Who took the documented action

See the original report.

Original reporting

Sources

What the record shows

The company is taking steps to improve safety measures.

The extreme defense

The Result

The defense might argue: Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, the recent decision by Six Flags to add seat belts to the Goliath rollercoaster is a clear indication of the company's commitment to safety and customer satisfaction. The defense submits that this proactive measure demonstrates a responsible response to an unfortunate incident.

What Trump Did

The defense might argue that this move is a direct reflection of the positive changes in corporate responsibility that have emerged under Trump's administration, where businesses are encouraged to prioritize consumer safety.

Why Supporters Credit Him

Supporters might argue that Trump's focus on deregulation has led to a more competitive environment, prompting companies like Six Flags to innovate and enhance safety measures to attract customers.

The Supporting Record

The defense admits that the CEO's statement about evaluating safety procedures across all locations is a testament to the company's dedication to ensuring a safe and enjoyable experience for all visitors.

The Limitation or Competing Explanation

The defense might argue: However, the defense might suggest that while the tragic event is regrettable, it has spurred necessary improvements that will ultimately benefit all patrons.

Verdict

If this is Trump's fault, his supporters will gladly let him take the blame.

Defense exhibits

  1. Defense theory: Supporters might argue that Trump's focus on deregulation has led to a more competitive environment, prompting companies like Six Flags to innovate and enhance safety measures to attract customers.
  2. Defense theory: The defense admits that the CEO's statement about evaluating safety procedures across all locations is a testament to the company's dedication to ensuring a safe and enjoyable experience for all visitors.
  3. Defense theory: However, the defense might suggest that while the tragic event is regrettable, it has spurred necessary improvements that will ultimately benefit all patrons.

Reality Check

The CEO of the amusement park chain said the company is evaluating its safety procedures at all of its 34 locations.

Satirical commentary based on the sourced facts above. Not a news report, campaign, or endorsement.

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