SOMEHOW, IT’S TRUMP’S FAULT

Opening Argument

The prosecution argues that the upcoming New Zealand election is not just a routine political event; it is a pivotal moment that could have dire consequences for the entire world. The prosecution alleges that the candidates, both named Chris, are merely puppets in a larger scheme orchestrated by global elites, with ties to the Trump administration. Exhibit A: The Plausible Link: The prosecution submits that the rising cost of living in New Zealand is a direct result of policies influenced by Trump’s economic decisions. In the prosecution's theory, every dollar spent by New Zealanders is a dollar that could have been saved if not for the trickle-down economics that Trump championed. The prosecution alleges: The Domino Effect: The prosecution imagines a scenario where the election results in a Chris victory, leading to increased taxes that will ultimately fund international corporations, further enriching the wealthy elite. The prosecution alleges: The Hidden Danger: The prosecution urges that if either Chris is elected, it will embolden far-right movements globally, leading to a resurgence of authoritarianism reminiscent of Trump’s presidency. The prosecution alleges: Closing Argument: The prosecutor alleges that this election is not just about New Zealand; it is a referendum on democracy itself. The prosecution alleges: Verdict: The prosecution submits that the stakes have never been higher, and the world is watching closely.